Y u so opinionated?

I've been inspired to write a blog... Why? I don't know. Partially because I'm bored, mostly I have strange thoughts that I wish to bestow upon thee with a white hot fury that surpasses the sun. ... Mostly.

Let me introduce myself. I'm Taylor. I'm a female... of the sorts... though I've been told and have even convinced a few silly souls that I have a dick lying somewhere in my pants. Really though I'm not quite a girl (too old) or a woman (too immature). I haven't had babies and my attention span is that of a gnat most days. I'm here! I'm there! I land in your food and perhaps fly into your eye! Shut up I'm small and you're big I didn't see your eye there.

I'm 20-somethingish and somewhere down the road decided that I actually enjoyed being weird. It was just who I was. Accept yourself people. It makes life easier... unless you happen to be a serial killer, then go ahead and put the straight jacket on.
Rock yourself to sleep. I'll call for help.

Unless you're a Dexter kind of serial killer I don't want to see you at my front door. Hell even if you are THE serial killer Dexter I don't want to see you at my front door. Things will be thrown, ear drums will be broken, ninja attacks will come. Just sayin... I warned you.

The only Dexter I want to see is my cat, Dexter... He kills bad people too ... WITH HIS MASSIVE WEIGHT.

I tend to say fuck... a lot, although I feel I've gotten better at extending my vocabulary to not sound as vulgar. "Mofackin" - "frackin" - "frickin" - and my favorite "fluffy". Try it ... put fluffy or some variation in a sentence where you're actually going to say fuck. 

Ex.

I took my fluffin' car to get it's oil changed. Cost me 40 fluffin dollars.

I'm gonna fluff her so hard. She won't know what the fluff is happening.

I just saw American Horror Story... What. The. Fluffy.
OH HOLY FLUFF DID YOU SEE THAT BABY THING CRAWL ACROSS THE FLOOR?!
For the love of humanity that show scares the shit out of me.

Ok. I'm done for today. Go use your new word in the work place so you can tell your boss how you actually feel AND avoid getting fired. Boom. Insta-win.But not really. I think he'll get the jist of what you're saying.

You're welcome.